A letter to my younger self

A green fountain pen on top of a document on a green leather-topped desk

 Hi

This is your future self here. I know it sounds weird, but I promise you it’s not someone playing a cruel practical joke. I’ll prove it’s me (you): You mix green and black inks to make your own green-black one like the blue-black ink that Parker do make. Also, you know all the words of The Twelfth of Never. You’ve never told *anyone* that!

I’m writing this because I’m hoping that I can save you from some of the misery and complete ‘lostness’ you’re feeling. I’m going to tell you one really, really important thing:

You’re right — you *are* a girl.

You genuinely are!! Your outside is wrong for you but, inside, you just *know* who you are. You’re like an LP that’s been put in the wrong sleeve — there’s beautiful music on it but no-one knows it’s there.

In just a few years’ time, though, (not quite yet, not while you’re still at school) you will be ready to change roles and be the woman you know you are. There isn’t a single word for it at the time you’re reading this but we call it ‘transitioning’ now. I’m not going to try to kid you that it will be easy — because it won’t — and it won’t be easy to wait, but my goodness it will be worth it. Please know that although your family will disapprove, especially in your early years as you, they love you. They won’t disown you, and with help from a really good doctor and the love of some even better friends, you will grow into a happy, confident woman and you will be able to cope with everything you will go through to get there.

You probably need to know in advance that society will be only a little more used to people undergoing ‘sex changes’ than they are now and it certainly still won’t be commonplace. Incidentally, we call it ‘gender reassignment’ now; the word ‘transsexual’ has gone out of fashion and we use the term ‘transgender.’ (Also, I started this letter by saying ‘Hi’ but we often say ‘Hey’ now instead. It’s said gently and not considered shouting.)

I’m not going to tell you what your name will be (spoilers!) but it’s one of the names you’ve often wished was yours. I *think* I’d read Ursula le Guin’s Earthsea Trilogy by the time you read this — she was right about the power of true names! If you haven’t read it yet, buy it (or borrow it).

Life will happen in a way you have not dared imagine. I’m not going to tell you anything about what else happens in your future/my history. Let’s just say that by the time you write this letter, you will be happy and at peace in your body, and that will have been true for the great majority of your adult life. We both just need you to know that.

Good luck — for yourself and for the woman you will finally be!! xx

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