 |
| The river, snapped on the way home from the office today. |
What is life as a transgender woman really like? Is it exotic? Does it revolve around trans issues? Do we all live ‘on the edge?’ Is it really, really, different from other peoples’ lives? Here’s what today, a typical weekday, looked like for me…
At 7
o’clock, the alarm rudely interrupted my sleep.
I wandered downstairs (having mashed the snooze button a couple of
times) and joined my Other Half, who is pretty much always up and about before
the alarm goes off. As per routine, the
day started with coffee, ablutions, and breakfast, in that order.
Like many
other people, I have a hybrid working pattern, working at home on some days and
in the office on others. Today was an
‘in office’ day. I pretty much always
call in at a family-run Sicilian deli/eatery for my takeaway cappuccino and
sandwich. Today was no exception (lunch
was a salami and Provolone cheese roll, made when I asked for one, if you’re
interested). I make a point of buying
things like pasta there as well, partly because it’s really good quality and
also to support a genuinely local business.
I’m lucky —
I enjoy my job, and I have wonderful colleagues, some of whom I’m proud to call
real friends. It’s great if there’s a
chance to catch up with them, and informal networking is worth its weight in
gold! If I’ve gone in for a particular
meeting, it may well be time to head into it before long. Otherwise, like today, I just set up and get
on with a normal working day.
In terms of how
being transgender affects my workday, it normally doesn’t but the current political
climate is anything but normal for us. We
had an all-staff call this morning and the current events were mentioned; we use
Slido for Q&A so I commented on it that the implications and potential consequences
for trans, non-binary or intersex staff are devastating, and that the same goes
for staff who have family members and/or friends in the same space.
Our office, located
in a rather nice newbuild, has gender-neutral toilets (with floor-to-ceiling
doors and no urinals), so at present no-one can call me out for using the
‘wrong’ one. Without massive structural
changes, though, if the different ‘blocks’ of toilets became gendered and trans
people were ordered to use the toilets of their birth sex, the accessible
“disabled” toilets would be in those gendered spaces. That hopefully won't happen! In this instance, it seems unlikely but it's rough that we're having to think about it.
----------
“What’s the
time, Mr Wolf?” “Dinner time!!” I enjoy
cooking from scratch but on weekdays it’ll often be something quick and easy. Today it was even quicker and easier than
usual, a sausage roll and salad, both bought on the way home. In all fairness, my partner - a cisgender
(happy in his birth sex) heterosexual man - does more than his fair share of
the cooking.
After
dinner, I wandered up to my computer in the study to do today’s Grauniad
crossword and write this. My Other Half
also wandered up to the study and is doing the stuff he normally does.
Eventually, though, “Time for bed” says Zebedee* at a suitable hour.
You know
what? In general terms and more usual
times, my days are just like many other people’s days. Being trans doesn’t mean that you ‘live on
the edge,’ or that you do exotic things all day every day. Until the last few
years, most of the time I hadn’t even had much reason to think about being
trans. That has changed, and not in a
good way.
Life is good
and I have never for one moment regretted at all taking the path I did. It was
simply the right path, the only path, for me.
My life is just - usually -more humdrum than people who don’t know anyone
transgender might think! And what’s
more, I like it that that way.
ps: This is
probably not the most exciting piece you’ve ever read — but that’s the whole
point! My everyday life is just… mundane.
— — — — — —
— — —
*Google the
1960s Magic Roundabout if you’re not old enough to remember
that line!
Comments
Post a Comment